«Better is a dinner of herbs where love is, than a fatted calf with hatred» (Proverbs 15:17).
In his book Love in the Time of Cholera, Gabriel Garcia Marquez describes the arguments between Fermina Daza and her husband, Doctor Juvenal Urbino de la Calle. One day, seized by anger and desperation, she yells at her husband: «Don’t you realize how unhappy I am!» He answers with these jarring words:
«Always remember that the most important thing in marriage isn’t happiness, but stability.» Fermina and Juvenal used to argue over trivial things. What’s more, one day they were so annoyed that they had to sleep in separate beds for some time. What was the reason for their fight? The supposed lack of soap in the bathroom. They both grew old and one day Juvenal died when he fell down the stairs. Then Fermina spent some time reflecting. She realized she had had an excellent husband, but when she remembered her life, she found more bumps than satisfaction, many mutual disagreements, useless quarrels and badly resolved resentment. But life had slipped her by. He was no longer there to start over.
To live in order to fight is not living. Especially when referring to a romantic relationship. I’ve known couples that are dating who frequently fight and, when they get married, that tendency doesn’t change much. One day, a neighbor lady mentioned that one of her daughters was married and traveled a lot because of her job. Then I asked her if that was affecting her marriage, but she answered, «Quite the contrary, if they don’t see each other as often, they don’t fight as much and last longer.»
Satan is a dangerous matchmaker: «Many marriages can only be productive of misery; and yet the minds of the youth run in this channel because Satan leads them there, making them believe that they must be married in order to be happy, when they have not the ability to control themselves or support a family. Those who are not willing to adapt themselves to each other’s disposition, so as to avoid unpleasant differences and contentions, should not take the step. But this is one of the alluring snares of the last days, in which thousands are ruined for this life and the next»—The Adventist Home, ch. 12, p. 84. Do you realize how important knowing how to choose a partner is? Who will you listen to when deciding on your love life? Jesus or Satan? Both have attractive offers for you, although with very different goals. The decision is yours to make.
Ask the Lord today to help you prepare for when the time comes to choose your partner in life.